Tooth Fairy Needs a PayDay Loan

Little Maxi Minx has spent the past month wobbling her 2 front teeth, requesting hard apples for her morning play-piece and furtively wiggling and wrenching them with her little fingers.  She wondered aloud if the Tooth Fairy would bring her a shiny gold coin for these teeth when they fell out, too, and that she hoped they’d be gone by Christmas.

“Oh no!” I teased her. “You’re one of the narrators in the Christmas Nativity. If you lose your 2 front teeth, you’ll probably get a lisp”.

“What’s a lisp?” she asked innocently.

“Well, you’ll be talking about baby Jethuth and the firtht Chrithmath“, I sniggered.  She thought for a bit.  “And you’ll be asking for Rith Krithpieth for breakfast”.  She smiled.  “Or juith and toatht”.   She threw her head back and guffawed.

On 28 November, she had a panic at breakfast time: she’d wiggled one tooth right around sideways in her mouth.  Although I was tempted to get her to yank it out, I remember what happened last time I said that… (She did, it made a gruesome ripping noise, and she bled profusely enough that I was scared.  Though she’d never have guessed as I’d hid my shaky hands and calmly got her to bite hard on some rolled-up kitchen roll).  So I talked her through rolling it back round in her tooth socket (“Left a bit, up a bit, in a bit, wee shoogle…”).  After I dropped her off at school, I made sure I had a £1 coin in my purse for that night.

Sure enough, when I picked her up from school that day she raced over to me, brandishing a blue envelope of paper hand-towel and sellotape.  But it was the *other* tooth that had gone!  Oh crikey, if that first one went in the next 6 hours till sleep, the Tooth Fairy was going to have to come up with a pretty convincing IOU!

Luckily, it held on till the next day – another pick-up, another blue envelope.  And again the kitchen and The Boss’s fingers mysteriously smelled of Brasso that morning. And were covered in glitter…

Maxi had decided that 2 visits from The Tooth Fairy in as many nights was beyond the call of duty, so on the way home from school she picked the few wild flowers she could find.  After her homework, she got a little scrap of paper and made a tiny bouquet for the Fairy.  I was so touched by her thoughtfulness that I had to think of some kind of reciprocal gesture.  All I could come up with was a smear of gold glitter under her pillow (and remember: glitter’s banned in our house this month till I stop sparkling when I cough).  Luckily, she was delighted with this exchange of gifts, and after trying to cast some spells with it (no Maxi, your sisters are still here, don’t have tails and don’t look like toads) she settled for keeping the glitter it on a strip of sellotape, and mounted it on a specially-wrapped box.

Oh to be 6 again, with such innocence and belief!  Meanwhile, Midi is attacking her own solid little 4 year old teeth with a greater intensity every day…

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